Dr. Tom Garcia

Come to the fire

Home » Fire Ceremony » Blog

Everyone Would Call It a Miracle – A Story of Forgiveness

Everyone Would Call it a Miracle - A Story of Forgiveness

Our oldest daughter has two dads. For all the years growing up, her dad and I were in constant conflict. Every time we came together we locked horns. Our relationship was bitter and contentious. I was angry and resentful. 

From the outset, the menace of alcoholism hung between us and cast a pall over our family. We were all held hostage to the ravages of alcohol. I did not know how to deal with the situation or where to turn for help. The more I resisted the more difficult things became and we all suffered, most of all our daughter. 

A hidden part of the conflict was my relationship with my own father and what had gone unresolved between us. There was a pattern repeating itself and I struggled to understand it. 

The light didn’t come for me to forgive my daughter’s dad until many years later–after I forgave my own father.

[Read more…] about Everyone Would Call It a Miracle – A Story of Forgiveness

Make a Circle

make a circle and put a fire in it
put a stake in the ground
tie yourself to it

take a stand—for yourself
and you’ll know what to do
lead with love

there is nothing love cannot handle
come from love in everything you do
you were made in love, by love, for love.
love is the only way

release your judgments and forgive
yourself first, and then the others
this is the depth of self care

be gentle with yourself now
so that your capacity 
to be gentle with others can expand
light as a feather…

your purpose is to love
and to forgive anything 
that appears unlike love

begin right where you are

Love and Blessings, 

Tom

Psychedelics and Spirituality in the United States

The Sacred Use of Plant Medicine

Psychedelics Meaning

There was a time when the word “psychedelic” conjured images of strobe lights and wild parties, flashbacks and people jumping off buildings. Psychedelics were demonized and regarded as dangerous. Now they offer new possibilities for health and spiritual wellbeing. We’re in the midst of a psychedelic revolution.

The psychedelic experience, ultimately, is a spiritual journey. The impetus to enter into the world of psychedelics or “plant medicine” often comes in response to an inner call. Our response to the call is a decisive moment, a movement toward authenticity, self actualization, and healing. It’s the willingness to examine our beliefs and deeply ingrained behavior. To confront the insidious nature of our cultural conditioning and let nothing escape scrutiny. To question everything. Such radical honesty is a form of surrender and not for the faint of heart.

[Read more…] about Psychedelics and Spirituality in the United States

Setting Boundaries

Setting Boundaries: On Being Unfuc*withable

Many years ago I encountered a boundary issue with a friend. The experience was upsetting to both of us and while it did not permanently damage our friendship, it was big enough that it got my attention. 

Naturally, I blamed him for failing to recognize my boundaries and my response seemed disproportionate to the circumstances. We both felt betrayed. 

After dissecting in my own mind what happened, and feeling righteously upset, it dawned on me that my sense of betrayal was one of self betrayal. I had failed to honor my own boundaries because I didn’t know what they were.

It was a revelation that left me euphoric because I knew the root of the problem lay with me and that to know and honor my boundaries was my responsibility, not anyone else’s.

I found a short length of barbed wire and kept it on my altar where I could see it everyday as a reminder, until one day I no longer needed a piece of barbed wire to remind me of my own boundaries.

[Read more…] about Setting Boundaries